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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  September 11, 2014 11:34pm-12:37am PDT

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is a little older today. she returned to manhattan. she believes to be the last surviving search dog that worked with the new york police and firefighters. that was her first mission with her handler. that's what he looked like 13 years ago. they worked 12 hours a day, searching for survivors. brittany made the firefighters smile. and sometimes the well-trained dog ignored her handler to put her head on the lap of the first responders who needed a little love. look at her there now. she's still a rescue dog. >> thank you for joining us tonight. >> bye-bye. >> from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his
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guests -- jessica chastain. jeffrey tambor. musical guest, chris brown. and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: new york! >> and now, here's your host, jimmy fallon! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, my god. [ cheers and applause ] >> hey buddy! >> jimmy: what is -- hugh, hugh jackman, no. [ cheers and applause ] welcome. you were on the show last night. >> yeah. you said come, so --
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>> jimmy: you told me never invite an aussie to stay with you. >> you invited me last night. >> jimmy: i did, and i made a a mistake. >> where have you been all day? was i too loud? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you have to leave. >> i'm gonna go. >> jimmy: you have to leave. >> i'm going to my mate's place. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, go see your mates. hugh jackman, everybody. he's got to get out of here. [ cheers and applause ] oh, my gosh. that is the best thing ever. [ cheers and applause ] you are the greatest. get out of here! >> i'm gonna stay at another night mate's place tonight. >> jimmy: yeah, go stay at a a different mate's place. yeah, bye. >> get on with it. >> jimmy: goodbye, i'll see ya. goodbye. take care. thanks, hugh jackman. i can't believe it. [ cheers and applause ] hey, hank. >> hey. thank you. hey, jimmy, i got you a little "thanks for having me," man. that's for later, later, later. >> jimmy: thank you very much. unbelievable. you never invite an aussie -- [ cheers and applause ] what is going on? >> couch is great. really comfortable.
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>> jimmy: unbelievable. thank you, hugh, i appreciate it. [ cheers and applause ] did you know about that? >> steve: yeah, we knew. >> jimmy: you both knew about it? >> that's not all there's more. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no more surprises. >> steve: the two of us. >> jimmy: give it up for hank kingsley right there, everybody. there he is. [ cheers and applause ] >> hey now. >> jimmy: hank, can you give us a good one? >> hey, now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you very much. i appreciate that very good. very nice. guys, welcome to "the tonight show." what is going on tonight? [ laughter ] this is the weirdest show so far. [ laughter ] well, here's what everyone is talking about. let's get to some news here, do what i'm supposed to do. during a very forceful speech last night, president obama announced that the u.s. will lead a huge multinational coalition to fight the terror groups in iraq. of course, most people just turned it off because they thought it was a rerun. [ laughter ] yeah, i have seen this before. [ applause ]
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some more news out of washington, the white house is opening a new visitors center that will have several exhibits, including one about favorite presidential snacks. [ laughter ] for instance, harry truman loved fried chicken. ronald reagan liked jellybeans and president bush loved play-doh. [ laughter and applause ] red tastes like cherry! this is kind of scary. this week, vladimir putin announced that russia is starting to build new nuclear weapons. but don't worry, we'll totally be able to shoot them out of the sky using our new exhibit on presidential snacks. [ laughter ] did you hear about this? yesterday, congress held a a hearing to discuss all the recent scandals the irs has been having. and here's what the head of the irs had to say. >> will you be following the law in that recapture? >> yes, wherever we can, we follow the law. [ laughter ] >> whenever we can. um, i encourage you to follow the law in all instances.
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[ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, i think he should follow the law in all instances. yeah. then he said to congress, "you first." very interesting. very, very interesting. [ cheers and applause ] as much as we can. i thought this was pretty interesting. a new study found that millennials, which are people in their 20s and 30s, actually read more books than older generations. [ cheers ] yeah. so much so that authors are now writing books specifically targeted at millennials, including remakes of some classic stories. like, take a look, first we have "great sext-pectations." [ laughter and applause ] "u up?" next, there's the "the adventures of @huckleberryfinn." [ laughter ] after that there's "emoji for war and emoji for peace." [ laughter ] and finally there's "atlas twerked." [ cheers and applause ] >> no! >> jimmy: yes, they're real.
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>> no. >> jimmy: yes. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: they're real ones. >> steve: millenials. >> no. >> jimmy: i swear! hey, listen to this, it was just reported that the number of single people in the u.s. is at its highest level in 38 years. [ cheers ] at which point the makers of haagen-dazs and makers of hot pockets high fived each other. [ laughter and applause ] gonna be a good year, dude. time to buy that yacht. time to buy that boat. that's right, the number of single people is at its highest level in almost 40 years. >> ha, funny you should say that, jimmy, because we're single. >> and we are ready to mingle. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right. where are you guys from? >> oh, us? we're from -- hey, jimmy, look, we know this was supposed to be a skit where we pretend to be audience members, but can we just be real for a second? >> jimmy: yeah. okay. >> hey, guys, i'm john and this is arthur. and we're two writers here at "the tonight show" and we're single. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> yeah. um, so this isn't the funny comedy bit anymore, we're actually single. [ laughter ] >> and we're lonely. we work here every day and we like it, but at the end of the day, we go back to our apartments and i have a cat. [ laughter ] >> and i have a chair that i sit in. it's a really comfortable chair and it's big, but it can't love me. [ laughter ] it's just a chair. >> jimmy: hey, guys, i think you're bringing everyone down. >> please -- please be quiet. [ laughter ] >> we're also worried that we may never find love. >> i'm a little on the hairy side in my chest and belly areas. [ laughter ] also, i'm 5'6." >> and i weigh 198 pounds. last year my doctor told me to lose at least ten pounds but i gained 15 pounds. and i have an appointment next week and he is gonna be mad at
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me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: so why are you saying this to everyone? >> because we want to let people know that if you want to be one of our girlfriends, you could just e-mail us at arthur meyer14@gmail.com. >> and johnwhaskell85@gmail.com. >> yeah, thanks for putting up those chyrons there, carol. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, you guys work at that. two single guys, everyone. [ cheers and applause ] hey guys, i saw that yesterday that shia laboeuf -- [ laughter ] i saw yesterday that shia laboeuf -- is that how you pronounce his name? shia laboeuf? where's the boeuf? >> where's the bouef? >> steve: shia leboeuf. >> jimmy: yeah. >> leboeuf. >> jimmy: yesterday, shia -- >> le-boof. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: shia --
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>> steve: laboeuf. >> both: laboeuf. laboeuf. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah thank you. i saw that yesterday that shia laboeuf pleaded guilty to disorderly conduct for making a a drunken outburst at the musical caberet this summer. pretty serious. i hear he is facing up to ten months of probation. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> laboeuf! >> jimmy: you guys see this. former child star, haley joel osment, you guys know that kid, right? from "the sixth sense?" [ cheers ] have you seen this photo? getting a lot of press because he gained a lot of weight for this upcoming movie. look at this, this is an actual picture of him. [ audience ohs ] "i see dead people." more like, "i see bread, people." [ laughter ] ♪ >> yes! >> steve: yeah! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: even m. night shyamalan was like, "i did not see that coming."
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[ laughter ] finally, i heard that mcdonald's is considering a new menu called the mcbrunch that will only be available on weekends. then haley joel osment was like, "starting when exactly?" [ laughter ] nah, we have a great show. give it up for the roots, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: hey! [ cheers and applause ] fun show tonight, already it's great. it's been a fun week so far, more ahead tomorrow night, emmy, tony and golden globe award-winning actress, glenn close, will be here. [ cheers and applause ] plus, justin long, comedian kirk braunohler and thank you notes. you don't want to miss it. so much fun to do those. [ applause ] and don't forget, monday night, the legendary barbra streisand will be here. [ cheers and applause ]
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she's gonna sing -- >> steve: sing! >> jimmy: she is gonna sing, i'm gonna talk to her and maybe do a little bit. >> you and -- >> jimmy: me and barbra streisand. >> and where is kirk braunohler? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: not on this show tonight. he's on the show tomorrow night. [ laughter ] barbra streisand, though, this is her first late night talk show guest appearance in over 50 years. i'm not kidding. >> steve: what? [ applause ] >> jimmy: i'm so honored. we're honored. we're so psyched. but first, joining us tonight is a great actress, her new movie "the disappearance of eleanor rigby: them" hits theaters tomorrow, jessica chastain is here. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: yeah! >> yeah! >> jimmy: very fun, cool movie. plus, we will be talking -- we will be talk with jeffrey tambor about his show on amazon. and -- [ laughter ] the great jeffrey tambor, there. >> steve: oh, come on! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he has a great new
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show on amazon. you can see it right now, if you go to amazon and look at the show, "transparent." >> that's right. september 26th. >> jimmy: yeah, it's unbelievable. and we have music from chris brown! [ applause ] >> steve: yeah! breezy! >> jimmy: breezy. you guys call him -- did you call him breezy? >> steve: breezy. >> jimmy: just breeze? yeah, breezy. >> breezy. >> jimmy: that's what i just said alright? >> breezy. >> steve: laboeuf. >> jimmy: what did i say? >> braunholer. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: breezy. not young breezy. >> oh, no, no, no. >> jimmy: young geezy. >> and now he is just geezy. >> steve: and yeezy. >> jimmy: and kanye is yeezy. >> steve: and lionel richie is easy. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: take care, buddy. take care. ♪ [ applause ] uh, hey, guys, it's september
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and you know what that means. it's back to school time. more importantly, it's back to books time. [ awkward laughter ] and to help you guys out, i'm gonna show you some books you should avoid at all costs. that's right, it's time for my latest installment of my "do not read list." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ do not read do not read do not read these books these books ♪ >> jimmy: before we start, i just want y'all to know that every book i'm about to show you is 100% real. these are actual books. you can find them on amazon or check them out at your local library. they are real. all right. let's see what's on my "do not read list." first one is a workout book. yeah. this one is "the complete book of exercise walking." [ laughter ] doesn't look like he is exercise walking. looks like he is doing some dad dancing out in the woods or something. [ laughter ] let see who the author is. gary d. yanker. >> steve: gary the yanker? >> no, gary d. --
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>> steve: oh, gary d. yanker. >> jimmy: gary d. yanker, yeah, he's america's foremost expert in walking. [ laughter ] let's see what type of stuff he's got going on. oh, yeah. here's picture of him walking. [ laughter ] it looks like he is racing home after eating at chipotle or something. [ laughter ] or maybe he's running from this guy. can you zoom in on him? looks like the villain from "roger rabbit," that guy. [ laughter and applause ] frightening book. gary d. -- >> steve: d. yanker. >> jimmy: gary d. yanker. >> steve: not gary the yanker. >> jimmy: once again, no. [ laughter ] >> steve: okay. my fault. >> jimmy: next book out there, for all you guys out there, you guys like reading books, right? [ applause ] >> steve: yeah, millennials. >> jimmy: "the joy of uncircumcising." >> steve: oh! >> jimmy: and you can see, it's a very thick book, so it must be a very joyful experience. look who it was written by, jim bigelow.
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[ laughter ] >> jim bigelow. >> steve: jim big and low? >> jimmy: no, not -- not jim big and low, jim bigelow. actually, this book is a lot longer but they cut the end off. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: really? >> oh no, no, no, no. >> steve: you used to work for a guy, didn't you, that did circumcisions? >> jimmy: what's that? >> steve: you use to work for a a guy that did circumcisions didn't you? >> jimmy: oh yeah, i didn't get paid though. i only worked for tips. >> steve: really? [ laughter ] really? >> jimmy: that was a good setup, thank you, buddy. [ laughter ] oldest joke. sometimes you come across a a book that seems so exciting that you think, "i don't care what this costs, i got to have this page turner." >> steve: right. >> jimmy: that's what happened when i saw "the natural history of vacant lots." [ laughter ] can we get any more exciting than that? >> steve: oh, my god. >> jimmy: it's got everything you could want in a book. got history, got lots, they're vacant. i could go on and on, but i won't. [ laughter ] >> steve: right. >> jimmy: next up is a
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a cookbook. >> steve: mmmm. >> jimmy: you like cookbooks? >> steve: love cookbooks. >> jimmy: everyone loves cookbooks. you can use this. this one's called "snacks and sandwiches." really? >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: what the hell is this thing? [ laughter ] that's what you're calling this disgusting loaf filled with mushrooms, asparagus and -- are those rubber pencil erasers? what is that? [ laughter ] it's not a snack or a sandwich. i don't know what that thing is. >> steve: ew. >> jimmy: don't read it >> steve: don't read that one. >> jimmy: no. ew! >> steve: ew! >> audience: ew! >> jimmy: next up is a book that everyone should have, everyone should own this. it's "the complete guide to rat training." [ laughter ] tricks and games for the rat fun fitness. what kind of trick or game is this rat doing with his finger? at least i hope that's his finger. >> steve: no. good old circumcision. >> jimmy: what? >> steve: that's what they used to do back in the day. >> jimmy: no, i don't think so. [ laughter ] >> steve: rats! >> jimmy: let's take a look
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inside here. >> steve: just a nibble. oh, stop. >> jimmy: stopping a fight. [ laughter ] "there are three ways to stop a a rat fight, you can first try startling the combatants by clapping loudly near them, and yelling 'stop it.'" [ laughter ] we're off to a bad start here already. >> steve: we're already in nightmareville. >> jimmy: i didn't want to train a rat, i definitely don't want to break up their fights. [ laughter ] then it says, "it could also be very effective to startle them by blowing on them as hard as you can." yeah, 'cause that's not weird. honey, i will take care of this rat, hold up. [ blowing ] "get closer to it, honey." just dangle the baby down there. have the baby blow on that rat. all right, we are down to our last book and this one is called "let's explore uranus." and this -- >> steve: you know who would love that book? >> jimmy: who's that? >> steve: gary d. yanker. >> jimmy: there you go, alright. [ laughter ] that's all for my edition of my "do not read" list.
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if you have a book you think should be on our next "do not read" list, i would love to see it. send your title to our blog at donotread@tonightshow.com. we will be right back with more of "the tonight show," everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ build your own chicken wraps or loaded breakfast sandwich. only $4 each. good eye, and very budget-conscious of you. does that mean i can get that new laptop?
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. thank you so much for watching. hey, guys, it's time for "tonight show hashtags." here we go. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ hashtags hashtags hashtags hashtags ♪ >> jimmy: now, you guys are on twitter -- you guys are on twitter, right? [ cheers and applause ] very fun. well, we use twitter on our show every single week. so, if you watch the show and you want to play along, we do this thing every wednesday where i send out a hashtag. we ask you guys to tweet out things based on that topic. so, since this year marks the 45th anniversary of "sesame street," i went on twitter and started a hashtag called "when i was a kid." and i asked you guys to tweet out something funny, weird or embarrassing that you did when you were a kid. we got a ton of great ones in. so, now i thought i would share
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some of my favorite when i was a kid tweets from you guys. but, i'm going to need a little help from some of my friends from "sesame street." so, here to read the first tweet, please welcome elmo! >> hello! [ cheers and applause ] jimmy! >> jimmy: hi, elmo! >> what's up, jimmy? >> jimmy: nice to see you. >> boy, elmo hasn't been here since it's been "the tonight show." this is swanky. >> jimmy: yeah, that is -- you said swanky? >> swanky. >> jimmy: yeah. thank you, elmo. that's big word for you, swanky. >> that's a nice watch. how much this cost? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i don't know how much it costs, elmo. [ elmo laughs ] elmo? >> what? >> jimmy: all right, ready. so, this first tweet is from @henrybossgolf. >> okay. >> jimmy: he says -- >> "when i first learned the alphabet, i thought it went, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, elemno, p." >> jimmy: there you go. thank you very much. thank you, elmo. that's funny! [ cheers and applause ] here to read the next tweet is cookie monster. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> hello! hi. hi, jimmy. >> jimmy: great to see you, cookie monster. >> it's good to see you. >> jimmy: now, cookie monster, this next tweet is from @bernalornothing. she says -- >> okay. okay. "i ate cheerios at least two at a time so none of them would be lonely." [ audience aws ] >> jimmy: aw, that's very good. >> that's so sweet. >> jimmy: that's very sweet. >> me gonna try that with the cookies. >> jimmy: yeah, we'll try that -- >> me not want lonely cookies. >> jimmy: okay, good yeah. me try that with me cookies. bye cookie monster. good to see you. >> buh-bye. bye. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: now, here to read this next tweet is abby cadabby. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] abby! abby cadabby. >> yes, yes! >> yeah. yes, it's so exciting. hi. >> hi there, jimmy. >> jimmy: abby. >> yes. this next tweet from @kaitlynhagan and she says -- >> okay. "when i was a kid, i thought the lyrics go, 'go charlotte, it's your birthday.'"
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>> jimmy: yeah, there you go. go charlotte, it's your birthday. yeah. thank you. thank you, abby cadabby. [ cheers and applause ] go charlotte, it's your birthday. [ cheers ] >> all right. all right. >> jimmy: i didn't even -- i didn't even introduce you yet. >> oh, never mind. >> jimmy: no, no. you can't leave, oscar. oscar the grouch here, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] great to see you, oscar. you happy to be here? >> no. >> jimmy: all right. >> let's get this over with. >> jimmy: all right. [ laughter ] this next tweet is from @packmandevo, he says -- >> "i used to slice hot dogs on the strings of my dad's acoustic guitar and then hide them inside it." i like that kid. >> jimmy: pretty ridiculous thing to do. but thank you, oscar, for being here. >> never thank a grouch. >> jimmy: here to read the next
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tweet is grover, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] grover! hi! >> nice ball, jimmy! >> jimmy: thank you. it is a nice ball. thank you, grover. grover, this next tweet is from @maddieline. she says -- >> ah, yes. "i was so concerned with scottie pippen got a cut in a a chicago bulls game, i sent him a band-aid in the mail." [ audience aws ] >> jimmy: aw, that's so nice. >> yeah. >> jimmy: thank you so much, grover. good to see you, buddy. >> good to see you. [ applause ] >> jimmy: here to read the next tweet is murray. hey, murray! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] hey, murray. good to see you. that's what im talking about. >> good to see you. how are ya? >> jimmy: fantastic. i'm always happy to see you. >> i'm happy to see you, sir. >> jimmy: very good. now, murray, this next tweet is from @tessbettinsoli. she says -- >> "my sister would only share her popcorn if i ate it off the floor like a chicken." [ laughter and applause ] [ chicken noise ]
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>> jimmy: and finally, here to read the last tweet -- is big bird! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] now that's what i'm talking about. hi, big bird! hi, big bird! this last tweet is from @sloopjohnbeav. he says -- >> "i was upset that the 'sesame street' theme song never actually told us how to get there. answer the question!" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: here you go. i know how to get there, and i will see you guys over there. there you have it. those are "tonight show hashtags." my thanks to big bird and all the characters from "sesame street." stick around. we will be right back with jessica chastain! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. everybody knows that parker. well... did you know auctioneers make bad grocery store clerks?
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♪ you have the most amazing hair of any man i've ever seen. you want to get out of here? well, i would love... [sfx: electronic noises] is that a yes? [sfx: old spice whistle] [ girl ] my mom, she makes underwater fans that are powered by the moon. ♪ she can print amazing things, right from her computer. [ whirring ] [ train whistle blows ] she makes trains that are friends with trees. ♪ my mom works at ge. ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest is a a golden globe award-winning actress. you know her from movies like "the tree of life" "the help" and "zero dark thirty." starting tomorrow you can see her starring opposite james mcavoy in a new film called "the disappearance of eleanor rigby." ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our pal, jessica chastain. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you look gorgeous. >> hi. i'm always so happy to be here. >> jimmy: thank you for coming back. we -- >> you were my very first, jimmy. >> jimmy: thank you.
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we were -- [ laughter ] >> my first late night. what were you -- my first late night. >> jimmy: that's what i was thinking, too, yeah -- absolutely. yeah. we said at the same time. >> yes, good. >> jimmy: jinx, buy me a coke. yeah. [ laughter ] >> okay. >> jimmy: thank you for being here on the show and i want to say congratulations on finally embracing social media. good for you. >> thank you. >> jimmy: yes -- [ cheers and applause ] it's not your thing, right? just don't -- >> well, in the beginning, i was nervous that, like if you had instagram, you had to like take pictures of yourself in a a bikini, like -- >> jimmy: duck face? yeah, yeah, yeah. >> you know, all those faces, i've never actually done that and put it on instagram, not the bikini but also even this. >> jimmy: you've never done the duck or face selfie? >> no. >> jimmy: this is called a a selfie. [ laughter ] you didn't know that, that what it's called? >> i have done it with like, fans. with another person, but never, like, taking pictures -- it's embarrassing. no one wants to see me going like -- >> jimmy: yeah they do, that's funny. you should do that >> do you do that? >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] i would never do that -- [ laughter ] but there's lots of good, fun
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pictures of you and your little dog, who i love and it's super cute. now the dog's name's chaplin? >> yes. >> jimmy: now why do you call the dog chaplin? >> well because he's got three legs, and i love charlie chaplin, when he sits down, he like, balances himself by taking his leg and going like this -- like, you know the picture of charlie chaplin with the cane -- >> jimmy: when the cane's bent? yeah, yeah. >> yeah, so he looks like charlie chaplin. >> jimmy: he looks like charlie chaplin when he sits? >> yeah, and he's a silent film actor. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i get, yeah, exactly yeah. he hasn't been in any films yet has he? >> yes he's in "the disappearance of eleanor rigby." >> jimmy: where -- >> he's like hopping down the street in the "her" film. [ audience aws ] >> jimmy: no way. all right, i want to see this. oh, cool, cool, cool. i also saw this awesome picture of this, killer jukebox you have in your house. >> yeah, man. >> jimmy: gorgeous one right here. >> isn't that gorge? >> jimmy: do you get it off of like ebay or something? >> no, so i was -- i'm obsessed with jukeboxes and had it especially made, it took a a year. i was just googling all around
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tryingfiguring how to get a a cool jukebox, with all the music i wanted. i found this guy named mickey treat. >> jimmy: mickey treat? >> yep from rochester new york. and i got a rockola jukebox completely -- he completely rechromed it, chose the colors i wanted, all the music i got to choose, it's like my favorite -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: do you know about this guy? >> no. >> jimmy: i want to get one of these things. wait, you chose your music, too? >> yeah i chose -- i had a a year, so i had a long time to, like, narrow down the list. 200 songs. it's awesome, man. >> jimmy: really? that's the best. i have another one for you, just to add to your collection. this is "reunited" by peaches and herb. so you can play this every time you hear it, we will be reunited, in spirit. >> fantastic. so nice is that ♪ reunited and it feels so good ♪ ♪ reunited and it's understood ♪ [ mumbling sounds ] [ laughter ] >> jimmy: anyway. [ laughter ] that's the -- and by the time you have it, we'll learn the song. [ laughter ]
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it is a good -- it's a good jam. i want to talk about this movie, "the disappearance of eleanor rigby." there's one -- explain this movie to me, because i know it's coming out, what, tomorrow? >> this weekend, new york, l.a. >> jimmy: it's coming out in new york, l.a. >> so we made "disappearance of eleanor rigby," love story. one from the male point of view, one from the female point of view, three hours 15 long, comes out october 10th. >> jimmy: okay. >> for those of you who don't want to spend three hours in the movie theater, we have a a combined version called "disapperance of eleanor rigby: them" opening this weekend in new york, l.a., next week, all over. >> jimmy: now, and it's a very tricky movie, very tricky to describe that. [ laughter ] but very tricky movie, because it is about a couple something happens. you don't really know what happened to them. something went wrong. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and you don't find out till -- i don't want to spoil it but i was like, i was very - - wow, moving, something happened. yeah. [ laughter ] >> yep. they are dealing with -- it's an adult love story, so they are dealing with the problems, they met in college and it's
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gone through the romantic stage of the relationship, and all of a sudden, this he have to deal with what it's like to be grown up and kind of some tough issues and see that if you can love someone enough to let them go or will they return. it's beautiful, has james mcavoy in it, just -- >> jimmy: he is fantastic. >> come on. [ applause ] >> jimmy: he's fantastic. it's shows -- reminds you -- it's romantic as well. we have a clip here, this is "the disappearance of eleanor rigby" in theaters friday. >> what are you doing? >> taking my shoes off. i'm going to leave first, and then when the time is right, like when the maitre d's not looking, you me down the street. >> excuse me, sir? ♪ >> run! run, run, run!
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, nothing wrong with a little dine and dash. >> i do not condone that kind of behavior! >> jimmy: of course not. >> all the waiters though, i do not condone it. >> jimmy: no exactly, don't skip out -- it's just a movie, you guys. yeah, don't do that at home. >> yes. >> jimmy: my thanks to jessica chastain. the hilarious jeffrey tambor joins us after the break. stick around, everybody. ♪ ♪ ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you know our next guest from such hit shows as "arrested development" and "the larry sanders show." starting september 26th, the first season of his new series "transparent" will be available on amazon. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome jeffrey tambor! ♪ [ applause ]
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>> jimmy: jeffrey tambor, thank you for being on the show tonight. >> my pleasure. >> jimmy: and every time you come and do our show, we always ask you to announce. >> yes, you do and you pay me twice, which is really great. >> jimmy: we don't, actually, but yeah. >> yes, you do. >> jimmy: oh, we do? >> yeah, we had a conversation backstage. >> jimmy: oh, i'm sorry about that. i apologize. >> no, it's my honor. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: but it's great -- because, obviously, you have done a lot of roles. but i loved "the larry sanders show," and i loved your character, hank. >> last time, when i came here and did hank for you, i didn't know that garry shandling was watching. if i would have known that i would have been very nervous and i got a nice message for him. >> jimmy: oh, did he like it? >> yeah, he loved it. it was great. >> jimmy: oh, good. i love garry shandling. gary, if you're watching, hi. >> hi, gary. >> jimmy: hi, gary. >> hi, gary. >> jimmy: this is just for you. the whole show, just for you buddy.
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the best. anyway, that's enough about gary. did you come up with "hey now"? >> no, it was written, but it's yelled from taxis still in new york. >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah. and it's on howard stern every 15 seconds. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. people think that's howard. it's me. >> jimmy: yeah, that's you. >> i was done 30 years ago. see, i was doing an interview. he said, would you say "hey now." i said, "hey now," and that's it. >> jimmy: that's the one they always play. >> yes. >> jimmy: that's the greatest thing ever. >> i'm not paid for that either. >> jimmy: no, you're not. [ laughter ] how's your family? how are your kids? >> i have five kids. i have a daughter in her late 30s. she's 40. [ laughter ] right. >> jimmy: doesn't sound right. >> and she just wrote a book. oxford university press, "the lost wave." and i have at home a nine, seven and two fours. >> jimmy: really? >> yes. >> jimmy: that's a lot -- >> it's a long time between drinks. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's a big age difference. yeah, it certainly is. yeah, absolutely. >> i get nervous for these things. i'm cool with acting, but these
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things make me nervous. and my little hugo, who is four years old -- i said, "what should i say to jimmy?" you know, i get nervous. and he said, "tell them you need to buy some hair." [ laughter ] i don't -- >> jimmy: that's very funny. >> yeah. well, he's no longer in the will. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: hugo! congrats on this show, "transparent." >> thank you. >> jimmy: it's on amazon right now. it's streaming. so right now, if you want to go on amazon, you can see the first episode. >> right, amazon prime. >> jimmy: amazon prime. i got to tell you, i was watching it and i almost started laughing. i thought -- because it's you with a wig. you're in -- you're dressed as a woman? >> yes. it's called "transparent," and i didn't get it until about two weeks into the production. i am -- no, i'm not -- [ laughter ] that it means i'm -- trans-parent. and i play maura pfefferman who
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is -- >> jimmy: maura? >> maura pfefferman. >> who is a woman who is changing from being the -- she is changing into the matriarch of the family. >> jimmy: yeah. you were morty. >> i was mort and -- that was one character and now i'm maura. >> jimmy: maura. and it's -- >> it's life changing. it's the role of my life. it's the most transformative thing i've ever done. jill soloway created it. >> jimmy: it's beautiful. it's touching. >> thank you. >> jimmy: yeah, i loved it. i really -- >> thank you. i don't mean you're beautiful. the show is beautiful. [ laughter ] >> actually -- >> jimmy: you're good. >> i'm not beautiful. i was described in the "new york times" by jennifer boylan as shlumpy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's good. >> i'm honored being shlumpy. >> jimmy: that's great. fantastic, yeah. >> thank you. [ applause ] >> jimmy: but i was watching it. and i go, i think this is really going to break down a a lot of barriers. and i think it's really kind of an important thing -- >> i think so, too. i think it's an important area. and there needs to be some love and life and humor and light
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shown on a very, very important subject. >> jimmy: and does your family, your actual family, do they support it? >> yeah, my daughter, eevee, went to the set -- seven. she went to the set, and we had sort of a very crucial moment together. i play maura, and i had to go and get my nails done. and so i thought we would have mani/pedis together. [ audience aws ] really. and i had to explain to her before we went to the set. and i went, "um, daddy's gonna -- um." you know it is. and it's very important to me that this is done correctly. i mean, i was throw up nervous about doing this. it's really important that it's done well. and not about being good or famous or anything like that, but just doing the subject right. and so i said to her, "uh uh." and she goes, "daddy." i showed her pictures and she said, "oh, she's just more comfortable being a woman." [ audience aws ] >> jimmy: that's exactly it. >> from the mouth of babes, right? >> jimmy: and you're like -- [ stammering ] exactly! we have a clip. i should mention the show is
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actually very funny as well. >> yes. it zigs where it should zag, and zags where -- >> jimmy: yeah. we have a clip. here's jeffrey tambor in "transparent." take a look at this. >> i'm sorry, dad. i'm sorry. i'm just trying -- can you just help me out here? are you saying that you're going to start dressing up like a lady always? >> all my life, my whole life, i've been dressing up like a a man. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: jeffrey tambor! the first season of "transparent" starts streaming on amazon prime instant video on september 26th. chris brown performs next. come on back, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ turn the trips you have to take,
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. our next guest is a talented, talented musician, his new album is "x" it will be out september 16th. [ cheers ] calm down. he's about to perform. he is gonna perform the title track and his hit song "loyal," with a little help from the roots. please welcome chris brown! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ if you're only as good as the company you keep then i'mma blame you ♪ ♪ for what they say about me when i was by myself i was fast asleep since you came around ♪ ♪ i've been up for weeks yikes i've been with the wrong crowd i can make you a believer ♪ ♪ if i turn the nonsense down i keep my secrets in a safehouse ♪ ♪ better if i don't speak devil's tryna tempt me they just outline my shape out ♪ ♪ place me at the crime scene i can see from this high up ♪
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♪ you ain't got a heart girl privacy is for the cheater ♪ ♪ obviously you're deceiving i know i know just who you are you put me on lay away ♪ ♪ you just love to heart shop oh yeah i think that it's over i think that it's over ♪ ♪ i swear to god i'm moving on ♪ ♪ ♪ i ain't go back no more i ain't go back no more ♪ ♪ i ain't go back no more i ain't go back no more ♪ ♪ i ain't go back no more i ain't go back no more i ain't go back no more
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i ain't go back no more ♪ ♪ you can start a fight i ain't fighting back i'm cool with it i simply came here to party ♪ ♪ why would i trip off that bull when i'm on that good ♪ ♪ i swear to god i'm moving on ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ just got rich took a broke i can make a broke but i don't mess with broke ♪ ♪ got a white girl with some i took her to the bay with me eyes closed smoking marijuana rolling up that bob marley ♪ ♪ i'm a rasta she wanna do drugs
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smoke weed get drunk she wanna see a player trap ♪ ♪ and i bet she love all the rappers when a rich want you want you baby ♪ ♪ and your can't do nothing for ya nothing no ah these girls ♪ ♪ ain't loyal no they ain't whoa these girls ain't loyal yeah ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's how you do it. got the pipes! got the pipes. chris brown! "x" will be in stores september 16th. we will be right back, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to jessica chastain, jeffrey tambor, hugh jackman. chris brown once again! [ cheers and applause ] that was great. and the roots right there, ladies and gentlemen, from philadelphia. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. hope to see you tomorrow. buh-bye, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and a

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